Elfa (pronounced Elfie) lived with Andy and his family for almost 10 years after her husband John ("Jack") died, when Andy was about 10 months old. He never referred to Elfa as "Grandma Swann." As the story goes, when Andy was learning to talk he had two "moms." The first was his Mom. The second was Elfa, who his mom referred to as "Mom." Confused? So was he! At some point soon thereafter he solved the problem by inventing his own name for her: Monken. Don't ask me where this came from (aside from that it starts with "M") or how the spelling came to be, but it quickly caught on. Jeff even called her that, and neither he nor Andy feels right calling her "Grandma Swann" to this day. We thought about honoring her by passing the name "Monken" down to her daughter when she became a grandma, but in the end there could be only one Monken.
Dorothy also never went by "Grandma Haxton," but this was a conscious decision made by adults, not the ramblings of an infant. (The author can say this, as he was that rambling infant.) She came to be known as "Gammer," even by some folks outside the family, as an homage to Tolkein's Lord of the Rings. I'm not sure if it actually appears there, but it's at least an extension of Sam's affectionate name for his father, "the Gaffer." (Although Dorothy's husband was called Gramps instead of Gaffer.) Becca thought the world of her Gammer, and we were fortunate to be able to share the good news of Maia's impending arrival with her. Unfortunately they never got to meet, as the cancer she fought for so long took her from us in 2006.
So here's to Monken and Gammer! You were both one-of-a-kind. Please look after your great-granddaughter, and may you both rest in peace.
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